YEA Lesson Library
A Romantic Encounter
About This Lesson
This lesson explains how Abraham found a wife for his son, Isaac. The student is led to think about their own marriage in the future.
Scriptures
Genesis 24:1-66
1 Corinthians 13:1-13
2 Corinthians 6:14-16
Ephesians 5:22-33
Ephesians 5:25
Hebrews 13:1-4
Words to Know
CANAANITE - A tribe that inhabited the land west of the Jordan.
The Lesson
In a few years you will probably start dating. Have you ever wondered who you'll ask out for your first date? Dating sometimes, but not always, leads to marriage. Dating may be the most common method used in today's world to find a husband or wife. But is dating the best or only way to find a person to fall in love with and marry? If not, what other options are there?
The Internet has changed the way many people find their life's mate. These services have increased dramatically over the past years. Psychologists are hired to design matchmaking surveys for love.com services. Questionnaires are worded in such a way as to improve the applicants' chances of finding a lasting relationship. The goal of these services is to make a match made in heaven. But this method may not be your cup of tea. So are there other ways to find the perfect mate? What matchmaking techniques should you use to improve your chances that divorce will never happen in your marriage? There's a Romantic Encounter in the Bible where the method used for selecting a perfect mate really worked for Isaac.
Abraham was old and Isaac was still single. He was the heir apparent, and his single status was of great concern to Abraham since God promised to make of Isaac many nations. For that to happen, Isaac needed a wife. But not just any girl was good enough for Isaac. If Isaac married a local girl she would be a Canaanite who served false gods. This was totally unacceptable to Abraham. He wanted to ensure that the girl Isaac married was of his own people whose religion was the same - a girl who served the one and only true God.
One day Abraham called for his faithful and trustworthy chief servant. This servant was probably one of the men who went up to the mountain with Abraham when God told him to sacrifice Isaac. Abraham asked his servant to swear that he wouldn't find a Canaanite wife for Isaac. He instructed the servant to go to his country, where his people lived, and to find and bring back a wife for Isaac. The servant had some misgivings and asked Abraham what he was to do if the woman wouldn't come back with him. Abraham assured the servant that if the woman he found for Isaac wouldn't come back with him, he would be released from this vow.
So the servant took ten of the master’s camels, loaded them down with jewels, fine clothing, and gifts to attract Isaac's bride-to-be. He knew well that he couldn't do this job without God's help. Selecting the correct mate for life is so important that God should always be included in such decisions. So when he got to Abraham's country he prayed for God's guidance. "O LORD, God of my master Abraham, give me success today, and show kindness to my master Abraham. See, I am standing beside the spring, and the daughters of the townspeople are coming out to draw water. May it be that when I say to a girl, 'Please let down your jar that I may have a drink, and she says, 'Drink, and I'll water your camels too' - let her be the one you have chosen for your servant Isaac. By this I will know that you have shown kindness to my master."
While the servant was still praying, a very beautiful virgin girl named Rebekah walked by with a water jar on her shoulder. She went down to the spring, filled her jar, and walked by again. "Please give me a little water from your jar,” Abraham's servant asked.
“Drink, my lord,” she said, and quickly lowered the jar to her hands and gave him a drink. This young lady was not only beautiful, she was gracious, mannerly, and did more than was required of her. Then she did such a neat thing. She asked if she could water the servant's camels. How do you think the servant felt when God answered his prayer. He must have thought that was really cool and said, "By all means, please water our animals." So she drew enough water for all of the servant's camels. Camels can go for long periods of time without drinking, but when they do drink, they consume a lot of water. What Rebekah did for this servant required a lot of work.
Abraham's servant was overwhelmed with Rebekah's graciousness and how God had so completely answered his prayer. He bowed down and worshiped God again in prayer, thanking Him for leading him to the house of Abraham's relatives.
Rebekah's family rolled out the red carpet for Abraham's servants. They prepared a room for them to spend the night and a meal for them to eat. The servant’s mission wasn't accomplished, and he couldn't eat until it was. He told the family why he had come and how God had blessed Abraham so abundantly. He related the entire story of what he was there to do and how Rebekah was an answer to his prayer. Then he asked Rebekah's father if he would allow her to go home with him and his entourage to marry Isaac. The father agreed for Rebekah to go. Again, the servant was so moved with gratitude that he bowed down to the ground and worshiped God.
The servant gave Rebekah gold, silver, and beautiful clothes. The next morning the servant was ready to return to his master and to take Rebekah with him. When this entourage neared home again, Isaac came to meet them. Rebekah covered her face with a veil and got off the camel. Isaac took her into his mother's tent and she became his wife, and he loved her very much. What a beautiful Romantic Encounter!
Student Prayer
Loving Father,
Thank you for the beautiful story of how Abraham sent his servant to find a wife for his son Isaac. Help me to always remember how gracious and kind Rebekah was and to follow this example.
In Jesus' name I pray.
Amen.
Daily Devotions
Sunday - 2 Corinthians 6:14-16
Monday - Ephesians 5:22-23
Tuesday - Ephesians 5:24-29
Wednesday - Ephesians 5:30-33
Thursday - 1 Corinthians 13:1-7
Friday - 1 Corinthians 13:8-13
Saturday - Hebrews 13:1-4
Objectives
At the end of this lesson, students will be able to:
1. Discuss what a "picture perfect" marriage should be like.
2. Explain that having a good marriage depends on how you treat your mate.
3. Tell things they should avoid when they are having marriage problems.
4. State loving things they can do for their mate when they get married.
Topics & Themes
Abraham
God’s Promises
Isaac
Marriage
Prayer
Prayer, Answered
Rebekah
Water
Worship God
Materials Needed
Bible, YEA students' and teacher's books, attendance and memory verse charts, songbook, chalk board or newsprint pad, chalk or marker, copies of a marriage certificate, frame
How to Teach This Lesson
After opening the class with prayer, divide your students into four groups and give each group one of the four marriage certificates listed above. Tell them they are to brainstorm and come up with a story of a marriage that will fit the way the marriage certificate they received looks. Give them a few minutes to do this. Bring the students back together to show their marriage certificate and describe the marriage that looks like their certificate. Keep the discussion safe by not allowing put-downs of other family situations.
Debrief - Ask: Which marriage certificate do you feel represents a godly, happy marriage? What are some things you think go on in this marriage to make it that way? Who has to be unselfish and willing to compromise on what they want? (Both parties.) What kinds of nice things do you think they do for each other? What qualities did you see in Rebekah that would make a marriage godly, happy, and lasting? Which marriage certificate depicts a marriage with a few problems eating away at it? What do you think could be some of the problems? When a marriage starts having problems what should the husband and wife do? (Pray together, put the other person's desires ahead of theirs, say "I'm sorry," be willing to forgive and forget.) What are some things they shouldn't do because they will make things worse? (Don't use four-letter words, keep their voices down, never insult the other person.) If this couple has children, does that put a greater responsibility on the couple to stay together? Why? Which marriage certificate depicts a marriage that has been torn apart and the couple is working their way back to stay together?
Fifth Marriage Certificate - Hold up this marriage certificate and tear it apart. Ask: What do think tearing the marriage certificate apart represents? Do you think that a couple who tears their marriage apart by fighting and saying thoughtless, cruel and bad things to each other values the marriage vows they took before God? Do you think some couples give up too soon on their marriage? Why? What changes do you think they will have to make to put that marriage back together? What kind of satisfaction will they gain from making their marriage work?
When You Marry Someday - Which one of the five marriages would you like to have? Why? What do you think you will have to do to have it? How can you help a teenager whose parents have divorced, or are divorcing?
Teacher-Directed Activity
Go over the Students' Activity. Tell your class there are no right or wrong answers to the first three questions, but you want to take a poll to see how they feel. Get the class to list the many good characteristics Rebekah showed to the servant at the well, and let them tell how these things could contribute to having a happy marriage. Poll the students, without condemning them, to see how many feel that it is important to marry a person of the same religious faith. Ask: What part do you think the servant's prayer played in his successfully finishing the mission Abraham sent him to do? How important do you think it is to pray that God will lead you to the right person to marry someday? Ask the students to give the six loving characteristics Rebekah showed that they found in 1 Corinthians 13. As the students give them, list them on the chalkboard.
REACH Activity
Memory Verse Spotlight: Ephesians 5:25
Look up the two “love” words used in Ephesians 5:25. Are they both the same? Write down the Greek word and its meaning. Does the meaning surprise you? Then find three other Scriptures where this word is used. Be careful not to cite a scripture that is using a different word translated into English as “love.”
Where in the World? How Far
This was not going to be a short journey for Abraham’s servant to undertake. Find an outline map of Israel during Abraham’s lifetime. Plot the point where Abraham lived. (You’ll have to use the Bible to find out exactly where his tent was pitched at this time because he moved around.) Then plot the location where Abraham sent his servant with the task of finding a wife for Isaac. Could he have traveled in a straight line? What is the most logical route for him to take? (Hint: you may have to look at a topographical map to get an idea of what would be most logical.) How far do you think he traveled - best guess? Put the copy of the map and your findings in your Bible notebook.
They Did What Back Then? Arranged Marriages
It was not unusual for the parents to get together and decide their son and daughter should marry. In fact, you can find examples of arranged marriages in both the Old Testament and an allusion to it in the New Testament. Write down an instance from both the Old Testament and the New Testament. Then contrast that with what is typically done in our culture today. File this all in your Bible notebook.
Making It Mine: Rebekah’s Perspective
Imagine that you are Rebekah. A stranger comes to you, says that he’s from your relatives who live far away, and then proposes marriage to a man you’ve never met. Are there any circumstances under which you would even consider going with this man? Think about how scary this would be - especially in our society today where the sex trafficking and sex slave business is alive and well! What if you were fully convinced that he was who he said he was? What if you were convicted by God’s Holy Spirit that you needed to go with him? Would you have the courage to step out in faith and go with him? I would strongly advise against doing anything like this - because of the society in which we live - but it is worth considering the faith and courage of Rebekah.
Write about this in your Bible notebook.
Worldview Collisions: Marriage
A Biblical worldview says that God has ordained marriage to be between one man and one woman for life. This is God’s perfect will. But mankind is far from perfect. There are legitimate reasons for divorce, especially when there is abuse or infidelity. But the secular worldview concerning marriage no longer limits marriage to a union between one man and one woman. There’s polygamy. There’s homosexual marriage. There’s even a case where a man married a cartoon character. https://www.ndtv.com/offbeat/japanese-man-who-married-fictional-character-in-2018-now-struggles-to-connect-with-her-2924199
As you’re thinking about this, consider the reason why marriage is between one man and one woman for life. Can you think of at least two good reasons? Write down your thoughts. Then go ask your parents. Or you can ask your pastor or Sabbath School teacher. God has very good reasons for what He does. Nevertheless, He doesn’t have to tell us why; our job is to trust Him and obey.
Questions
As you’re working through the YEA lesson, Daily Devotionals, doing the activity, or reading the Bible, be sure to write down any questions you have. That way you’ll remember to ask someone. Also remember to share the really interesting things you’re learning with family and friends.
Song
"Fill My Cup" is on page 83 of The Group Songbook.
Closing Prayer
Have the students form a circle, hold hands, and give one characteristic they feel would help make a marriage godly, lasting, and happy. Lead in prayer asking God to help the students to remember this lesson when they start thinking about marriage.
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